harkback | Matthew Heiti
  • Persona
  • Publications
  • Productions
  • Projects
    • GRAVE
    • 8BITMYTHS >
      • TABLE OF DISCONTENTS
    • SATURDAY MORNING RE:RETRO
    • WORLD WEARY ADVENTURES >
      • THE BARBARIC PRACTICES OF ELECTION DAY

Wave 1

11/2/2015

0 Comments

 
Picture
Picture
e had to fight, they said. When he asked why, they simpered and wrung their hands. No damsel to be saved, no kingdom to conquer, no villain to overcome. There was certainly no reward. But haven’t you always wanted to be a hero, they said. No, he hadn’t. He was moderately content with his mid-level salary, midtown condo, middling midlife mediocrity. They simpered some more. But what about flying, they said, bet you always wanted to fly. No, he said. Flying made him sick. 
    In the end, they drugged him and stuffed him in a trunk. The next thing he knew, here he was, sitting on an ostrich on a ledge over a pool of lava. And they’d taken all his quarters.
    Bridle, reins, saddle. Just like a horse, they said. But he’d never ridden a horse. No problem, they said, this one flies itself. But ostriches can’t fly, he said. Shut up, they explained.
    He dug his heels into the ostrich’s side. Giddy up. It turned its head and hissed at him.
    He heard flapping above him, and looked up to see large birds circling. Buzzards. They didn’t look friendly. He peered down. Far below the ledge, the lava was rising.
    He didn’t like this. It was all too exciting. He liked monotony. He liked doing the same thing over and over. That’s why he’d answered the ad in the first place. Wave after wave, they told him, wave after wave after wave.
    Something hit the ledge near him with a wet slap. Steaming and stinking. Buzzard shit.
    The ostrich spooked and started to run for the edge. It spread its stunted wings. He was still pretty sure ostriches couldn’t fly.

0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    8bitmyths

    Remember when you were a minipop, and you saw that film, you know, the one you loved that never had a sequel? Well, let's say it did. And it was just like you imagined it, only a little bit worse.

    8bitmyths is a series of polaroid fiction that digs through the relics of not-too-distant popular culture.
    The heroes of youth, specifically that neon-hued era of the 1970s and 80s, are exhumed in all their orange shag and velcroed glory. The intent is not to celebrate, but to drag these characters, limping and shambling, into the present – to show the cracks in our idyllic vision of childhood, and also the power of a darker world than we could ever have dreamed. 


    Table of
    Discontents


    Archives

    September 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015

    Categories

    All
    Cartoons
    Comics
    Commercials
    Films
    Food
    Holiday Specials
    Music
    Toys
    TV Shows
    Video Games

    RSS Feed

© 2022 Matthew Heiti. All Wrongs reversed
  • Persona
  • Publications
  • Productions
  • Projects
    • GRAVE
    • 8BITMYTHS >
      • TABLE OF DISCONTENTS
    • SATURDAY MORNING RE:RETRO
    • WORLD WEARY ADVENTURES >
      • THE BARBARIC PRACTICES OF ELECTION DAY